Rush Will Rock You

Via Atrios.

Blair Will Rock You

Via Matthew Yglesias.

And, of course, the granddaddy of political splicings:

Daily Times Endorses Bryan Lentz Over Tom Gannon

Good for the Times:

Pa. House, 161st District: In one of the most spirited — and nasty — legislative campaigns, longtime Republican Rep. Tom Gannon is being challenged by Democrat Bryan Lentz. This race offers residents two strong, attractive candidates in a race that has shown the best — and worst — of local politics.

…

But where this race really sizzles is in some of the personal attacks offered in ads and mailers. A Republican ad has denounced Lentz for his legal defense work for a man who was charged with taking an indecent picture of a boy at a Variety Camp. The ad suggests Lentz worked “to put a child predator back on the streets.” Gannon also once cited Lentz’s lack of community service, apparently oblivious to his military service.

Gannon, himself a lawyer, defends the ad, and says the voters had a right to know what kind of work his opponent was doing. He questioned whether someone with that type of work experience should be seeking public office.

Lentz believes the attacks to be dishonest. This newspaper tends to agree, and point out that such negative pieces are exactly why so many people are being turned off to politics. They are beneath the clear qualifications of both of these office seekers.

Voters in the 161st District in all reality will not go wrong with either Gannon or Lentz in Harrisburg. But the endorsement goes to the newcomer Bryan Lentz, in no small part because of the nasty, negative tenor Gannon’s brought to the campaign.

NBC Daringly Tries Airing "Comedies" on "Thursdays"

NBC moves 30 Rock, returns Scrubs to Thursday lineup:

NBC will return the Emmy Award-nominated “Scrubs” and move freshman comedy “30 Rock” to Thursday nights beginning November 30 to form a new two-hour 8-10 p.m. (ET) comedy block with “My Name Is Earl” and “The Office.” The change will follow a special super-sized night of comedy two weeks earlier on Thursday, November 16, with three 40-minute episodes of “My Name Is Earl,” “The Office” and “30 Rock.”

My ambivalent feelings towards 30 Rock aside (love Alec, Tracy; undecided on Tina, plot), this may be their most consistent lineup ever.

This Election Is So Not About Taxes

It’s hard to see a commercial like this and not punch people decrying a Democratic-led Congress because “they’re just gonna raise taxes”.

Ignoring that Bush’s tax cuts won’t be up for renewal until 2010, making them an issue this Congress won’t even debate, if you think this election is about taxes, then fuck you.

This is nothing less than a referendum on the direction of America -

Are we afraid of what may be wrong, or hopeful about what could go right?

Why Paris Hilton Is Famous

• Why Paris Hilton Is Famous (Or Understanding Value In A Post-Madonna World)

  I’m amused by Paris Hilton.

  If Madonna was Marketing 1.0 then Paris Hilton is Marketing 2.0.

  She’s a real life version of what value is and how it is created today.

Why Ban Books About Banning Books When We Can Just Burn Them

• Parent criticizes book ‘Fahrenheit 451’:

  A Caney Creek High School dad is fired up because the Conroe Independent School District uses the book “Fahrenheit 451” as classroom reading material.

  Alton Verm, of Conroe, objects to the language and content in the book. His 15-year-old daughter Diana, a CCHS sophomore, came to him Sept. 21 with her reservations about reading the book because of its language. “The book had a bunch of very bad language in it,” Diana Verm said. “It shouldn’t be in there because it’s offending people. … If they can’t find a book that uses clean words, they shouldn’t have a book at all.”

  Alton Verm filed a “Request for Reconsideration of Instructional Materials” Thursday with the district regarding “Fahrenheit 451,” written by Ray Bradbury and published in 1953. He wants the district to remove the book from the curriculum.

  “It’s just all kinds of filth,” said Alton Verm, adding that he had not read “Fahrenheit 451.”

He wants to ban a book about book banning that he hasn’t read during banned book week.

I think my brain just infarcted.

How To Recognize A Stroke

• Always good to know:

  A neurologist says that if he can get to a stroke victim quickly he can totally reverse the effects of a stroke. He said the trick was getting a stroke recognized, diagnosed and getting to the patient within 3 hours, which is tough. Sometimes symptoms of a stroke are difficult to identify. But doctors say a bystander can recognize a stroke by asking three simple questions:

  1. Ask the individual to SMILE.
  2. Ask him or her to RAISE BOTH ARMS.
  3. Ask the person to SPEAK A SIMPLE SENTENCE (Coherently, ie: It is sunny out today)

  If he or she has trouble with any of these tasks, call 9-1-1 immediately and describe the symptoms to the dispatcher.

  Via bb.

Gunman Shoots Six Dead In One-room Amish Schoolhouse

School shootings are one modern trend the Amish should’ve definitely stayed away from:

A gunman killed six people at a one-room Amish schoolhouse Monday morning in Pennsylvania’s bucolic Lancaster County, and several others were taken to hospitals with injuries, authorities said.

“So far, six confirmed dead, and the helicopters are pulling into (Lancaster General Hospital) like crazy,” Coroner G. Gary Kirchner said.

New Jersey Doesn't Want You To Know The Real Story Behind U2

I noticed the following disclaimer for U2's new book in this week's Best Buy ad:

*U2 by U2

This is the story of U2-written and publicized by the band. Not available online or in New Jersey stores.

What can't you handle New Jersey? Is it because you're afraid that given instructions on how to dismantle an atomic bomb, terrorists may figure out how to remantle said bomb?

I believe this conspiracy goes to the highest levels, and I also believe that when it plays out in my head, it devolves into a gay sex orgy featuring Governor John Corzine, Senate President Richard "Dick" Codey, and former Governor Jim McGreevey.

However "Dick" Codey is played not by himself, rather by an idealized creation more fitting a rugged name like "Dick" Codey.

Real Dick

Better Dick

BONUS LINK: How to dismantle an atomic bomb, for reals.

So what you're saying is you have a problem that is totally your problem but you'd like to find a way to make that problem my problem.